In other news, one English supporter lost a bit more than pride when Wales beat them. Darwin thanks him for not tainting the gene pool. In a stunningly unobvious statement, police confirmed that the person had a history of mental problems. Well, from now on, he's also likely to have severe dating problems.
And dating problems is precisely what a shy 23 year old gorilla is experiencing. In an article chock full of quotable sound bites, various human handlers do a hatchet job on this much maligned primate's name, character and general masculinity.
He's a wimp
You can sort of tell he's inexperienced,
"He's too nice a guy ... It might be the problem with why he never bred."
He's accustomed to females not being interested
She's waiting for him to show his masculinity, and he didn't show it
And the ultimate insult (for a gorilla);
He's very interested in human males